– Lukas Kaspar has heeded our advice to all of you and given up on his dream of becoming an NHL player. According to the Glen Falls Post-Star the former first round draft pick and the Phantoms mutually agreed that he was never going to make it back to the NHL and that it’d be better for both parties involved if he were to pack his steamer trunk and head over to Finland where he could be a big fish in a small pond. Kaspar is survived by 16 games, 2 goals, and 2 assists in the NHL – a modern day set of singed but not burnt wax wings for him to hang on the wall of his new Finnish home. – David Sloane’s prison sentence was lifted early as Sloane was recalled to the Phantoms yesterday from the Kalamazoo Wings of the ECHL. I thought that the Phantoms already had like 9 defensemen but apparently Kevin Marshall was tired of playing steady QB during their pregame football matches, which would make sense seeing as he’s a defenseman

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